Physical Custody

What Is Physical Custody

Understanding Residential Custody

Physical custody (also called “residential custody” in some states) determines where your child lives and which parent provides day-to-day care. It establishes the child’s primary residence and dictates the parenting time schedule.

Simple Definition:

Physical custody = Where the child lives and who provides daily care (meals, bedtime, homework, transportation, etc.)

This is completely separate from legal custody, which determines who makes major decisions.

Why Physical Custody Matters

Physical custody is crucial because it determines:

✓ Where the child lives day-to-day
✓ Which parent provides daily care and supervision
✓ The child’s routine and stability
✓ School district the child attends
✓ Parenting time schedule for both parents
✓ Which address is used for school, medical care
✓ Child support calculations (based on parenting time percentage)
✓ Tax benefits (claiming child as dependent)

The impact is immediate and daily. Unlike legal custody (which involves periodic major decisions), physical custody affects your child’s life every single day.

Other Names for Physical Custody

Different states use different terminology:

Common Terms:

• Physical custody (most states)
• Residential custody (some states)
• Primary physical custody (when one parent has majority time)
• Parenting time (modern, child-focused term)
• Time-sharing (Florida)
• Residential responsibility (some states)
• Custodial parent = parent with primary physical custody
• Non-custodial parent = parent with less physical custody time

This guide uses “physical custody” but the concepts apply regardless of terminology in your state.

What Physical Custody Includes

The parent with physical custody at any given time:

Provides Daily Care:

• Meals and nutrition
• Bathing and hygiene
• Bedtime routines
• Homework supervision
• Transportation to school/activities
• Day-to-day supervision
• Routine healthcare (bandaids, cold medicine)
• Clothing and basic needs

Makes Day-to-Day Decisions:

• What to eat for dinner
• Bedtime on school nights
• Daily activities and play
• Screen time limits
• Discipline for minor issues
• Social activities during their time
• Daily schedule and routine

Does NOT automatically include:

• Major decision-making (that’s legal custody)
• Right to relocate with child
• Authority to change schools
• Consent for medical procedures
• Long-term planning decisions

Physical Custody vs Legal Custody

The Critical Difference

Understanding the distinction between physical and legal custody is essential. Many parents confuse them.

Quick Comparison

AspectPhysical CustodyLegal CustodyWhat it determinesWhere child livesWho makes major decisionsFocusDaily residence and careImportant life choicesExamplesChild lives with mom M-FBoth parents choose schools togetherDay-to-day impactEvery single dayPeriodic (when major decisions needed)AffectsChild's home, routine, stabilityEducation, healthcare, religionCan be split?Yes (50/50 or other %)Yes (joint or sole)Independent?YesYes - completely separateDetermines child supportYes (major factor)NoMost contestedOften yesLess so (most states favor joint legal)

You Can Have Different Arrangements

It’s common to have:

✓ Joint legal custody + Sole physical custody to one parent
✓ Joint legal custody + Joint physical custody (50/50)
✓ Joint legal custody + Primary physical custody to one parent
✓ Sole legal custody + Joint physical custody (rare)
✓ Sole legal and physical custody to one parent

Real-World Examples

Example 1: Joint Legal, Primary Physical to Mother

Jessica and Michael divorced in Texas.

LEGAL CUSTODY: Joint
- Both make major decisions together
- Both choose schools
- Both consent to medical procedures
- Must communicate on important matters

PHYSICAL CUSTODY: Primary to Jessica (70/30)
- Children live with Jessica Monday-Friday
- Michael has every other weekend + one weeknight
- Jessica's home is primary residence
- Children attend school in Jessica's district
- Michael pays child support (based on 70/30 split)

Day-to-day during Jessica's time:
- Jessica decides meals, bedtime, daily activities
- Jessica supervises homework
- Jessica handles routine care

Day-to-day during Michael's time:
- Michael decides meals, bedtime, activities
- Michael supervises homework
- Michael handles routine care

Major decisions (school choice, medical procedures):
- Both must agree (joint legal custody)

Example 2: True 50/50 Joint Physical

Lauren and David have cooperative co-parenting.

LEGAL CUSTODY: Joint
PHYSICAL CUSTODY: Joint (50/50)

Schedule: Week on/week off
- Week 1: Children live with Lauren
- Week 2: Children live with David
- Alternate weeks throughout year

Result:
- Equal time with both parents
- Both provide daily care equally
- No "primary" parent
- Usually no child support (incomes similar, equal time)
- Children have two true homes
- Each parent fully engaged in daily life

Example 3: Sole Legal and Physical to Father

Mother has serious substance abuse issues.

LEGAL CUSTODY: Sole to Father
- Father makes all major decisions alone
- Mother has no decision-making authority

PHYSICAL CUSTODY: Sole to Father
- Children live with father full-time
- Mother has supervised visitation only (4 hours/week)
- Father provides all daily care
- Mother cannot have children overnight

Result:
- Father has complete custody
- Mother maintains relationship through visits
- Mother pays child support
- Mother can seek modification if rehabilitates

Why They’re Separate

Courts separate physical and legal custody because:

Different Skill Sets:

• Being a good decision-maker ≠ ability to provide daily care
• Some parents excellent at daily care but poor communicators
• Some parents travel frequently (can’t provide daily care) but make sound decisions

Practical Realities:

• Geographic distance may prevent equal physical time
• Work schedules may limit one parent’s availability
• But doesn’t mean that parent can’t participate in decisions

Child’s Best Interests:

• Child may need stability of one primary home
• But benefit from both parents’ input on major decisions
• Separating them allows court to optimize both aspects

Flexibility:

• Allows creative solutions
• Tailors arrangements to each family
• Recognizes different parental strengths

Decision-Making During Physical Custody Time

Important clarification:

The parent with physical custody at the time makes day-to-day decisions, even with joint legal custody.

Day-to-Day (no consultation needed):

During Mom's week:
- Mom decides what's for dinner
- Mom sets bedtime
- Mom chooses weekend activities
- Mom handles homework routine
- Mom disciplines minor issues
- Mom decides on playdates

Major Decisions (both parents if joint legal):

Regardless of whose physical custody time:
- Choosing/changing schools → both decide
- Medical procedures → both consent
- Starting therapy → both agree
- Religious instruction → both decide
- Expensive extracurriculars → both agree

Types Of Physical

Main Categories and Variations

Physical custody arrangements fall into several categories. Understanding each helps you determine what to seek.

1. Joint Physical Custody (Shared Physical Custody)

Definition: Both parents have significant periods of physical custody. The child lives with each parent for substantial time.

Time Split:

"Substantial time" varies by state:
- Some states: 35% or more = joint physical
- Other states: 40% or more
- California: "significant periods" (vague)
- Many states: Close to 50/50 preferred

Common splits:
- 50/50 (equal)
- 60/40
- 55/45
- 2-2-3 schedule
- Week on/week off

Characteristics:

✓ Both parents are actively involved in daily care
✓ Child has two homes (mom’s house and dad’s house)
✓ Frequent transitions between homes
✓ Requires good communication between parents
✓ Geographic proximity usually necessary
✓ Shared daily responsibilities
✓ May reduce or eliminate child support
✓ Both parents fully engaged in child’s life

Joint Physical Custody Schedules:

50/50 Schedules:

WEEK ON/WEEK OFF:
Monday-Sunday with Mom
Monday-Sunday with Dad
(Alternates each week)

Pros: Long stretches with each parent, simple
Cons: Long time away from other parent, young kids struggle

2-2-3 SCHEDULE:
Mon-Tue: Mom
Wed-Thu: Dad
Fri-Sat-Sun: Alternates (Mom one week, Dad next)

Pros: Frequent contact with both, no long stretches
Cons: Lots of transitions, can be disruptive

2-2-5-5 SCHEDULE:
Mon-Tue: Mom
Wed-Thu: Dad
Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue: Alternates

Pros: Regular routine, each parent gets weekends
Cons: Still many transitions

3-4-4-3 SCHEDULE:
First week: Mon-Wed with Mom, Thu-Sun with Dad
Second week: Mon-Wed with Dad, Thu-Sun with Mom

Pros: Each parent gets weekdays and weekends
Cons: Complex to track

60/40 Schedules:

EVERY OTHER WEEKEND + ONE WEEKNIGHT:
Mom: Monday-Friday (every week) + alternating weekends
Dad: Every other weekend + one weeknight

Result: Mom ~70%, Dad ~30% (not quite joint)

EXTENDED WEEKENDS:
Mom: Monday morning - Friday after school
Dad: Friday after school - Monday morning

Result: ~60/40 if combined with some weeknights

Requirements for Joint Physical:

Courts look for:

• Geographic proximity (same school district ideal)
• Ability to communicate and cooperate
• Similar parenting styles (not required but helpful)
• Child’s age and needs
• Willingness of both parents
• Stability in both homes
• Work schedules that allow it

May not work if:

• High conflict between parents
• Geographic distance too great
• One parent’s work schedule prevents it
• Child has special needs requiring one primary home
• Domestic violence history
• Young infant (though possible)

States’ Approach to Joint Physical:

Presumption States:

• Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana: Presumption favoring joint
• Must show joint is not in best interest to overcome

No Presumption:

• Most states: Considers joint but no presumption
• Evaluate based on child’s best interests

Requires Agreement:

• Some states: Joint physical only if both parents agree
• Court won’t force unwilling parent into 50/50

Advantages:

For Children:

• Maintains strong relationship with both parents
• Minimizes feeling of “losing” a parent
• Benefits from active involvement of both
• Sees both parents as equal caregivers

For Parents:

• Shared daily responsibilities
• Both remain fully involved
• Neither feels excluded
• Recognizes both as capable parents

Financially:

• May reduce/eliminate child support
• Both bear daily expenses during their time
• More equitable financial arrangement

Disadvantages:

For Children:

• Frequent transitions between homes
• Two sets of rules/routines
• Can be disruptive to stability
• Packing/unpacking constantly
• Hard to feel “settled”

For Parents:

• Requires high level of communication
• Must coordinate schedules constantly
• Can’t move freely
• Less flexibility
• Geographic restrictions

2. Sole Physical Custody

Definition: Child lives primarily with one parent (the “custodial parent”). The other parent (the “non-custodial parent”) has visitation rights.

Time Split:

Typically:
- Custodial parent: 70-100% of time
- Non-custodial parent: 0-30% of time

Common arrangements:
- Every other weekend (14% to non-custodial)
- Every other weekend + one weeknight (20%)
- Summers only (varies)
- Supervised visitation only
- No visitation (extreme cases)

Characteristics:

✓ Child has one primary home
✓ One parent provides most daily care
✓ Clear residential address (for school, medical)
✓ Other parent has “visitation” not custody
✓ Non-custodial parent pays child support
✓ More stability for child (one main home)
✓ Less communication required between parents
✓ Custodial parent has more control over daily life

Common Sole Physical Custody Schedules:

STANDARD POSSESSION ORDER (Texas):
1st, 3rd, 5th weekends (Friday 6pm - Sunday 6pm)
Thursday evenings 6pm-8pm
30 days in summer
Alternating holidays

Result: ~20% to non-custodial parent

EVERY OTHER WEEKEND:
Alternating Sat-Sun (or Fri-Sun)
Maybe one weeknight dinner

Result: ~14% to non-custodial parent

EXTENDED SUMMER:
School year: Every other weekend only
Summer: 4-6 weeks continuous

Result: ~25-30% to non-custodial parent

SUPERVISED VISITATION:
4 hours per week at visitation center
No overnight visits

Result: ~2% to non-custodial parent

Reasons for Sole Physical:

Child-Related:

• Child’s age (infant/toddler may need one primary caregiver)
• Special needs requiring consistency
• School/activity schedule works better with one home
• Child’s expressed preference (if age-appropriate)

Parent-Related:

• One parent’s work schedule prevents shared custody
• Geographic distance between parents
• One parent historically primary caregiver
• Other parent less involved historically

Relationship-Related:

• High conflict making joint physical impossible
• Inability to communicate
• Domestic violence concerns
• Substance abuse (but parent still gets some visitation)

Does NOT require:

• Other parent be “unfit” (that would eliminate visitation)
• Any wrongdoing by non-custodial parent
• Proof of harm from joint custody

Important Distinctions:

Sole Physical ≠ No Relationship:

Non-custodial parent typically:
✓ Has regular visitation schedule
✓ Maintains relationship with child
✓ Participates in child's life
✓ May have joint legal custody (decision-making)
✓ Accesses child's records
✓ Attends school events, activities

Sole Physical ≠ Sole Legal:

Common combination:
- Joint legal custody (both make decisions)
- Sole physical custody to one parent

Result:
- Child lives primarily with one parent
- But both parents share decision-making

Advantages:

For Children:

• Stability of one primary home
• Consistent routine and structure
• Less frequent transitions
• One primary school/community
• Easier for younger children

For Custodial Parent:

• More control over daily life
• Less coordination with ex
• Can establish own routines
• Geographic flexibility (within limits)

For Non-Custodial Parent:

• Clear schedule (less ambiguity)
• Quality time during visitation
• Less daily stress
• Can focus on special activities

Disadvantages:

For Children:

• Less time with non-custodial parent
• May feel they “lost” a parent
• Risk of relationship decline with non-custodial
• Can create power imbalance

For Custodial Parent:

• All daily responsibility
• Less breaks/personal time
• Bears most childcare burden
• Can be overwhelming

For Non-Custodial Parent:

• Limited time with child
• Miss daily moments
• Feels like “visitor” not parent
• Pays child support
• Less involved in daily life

3. Primary Physical Custody

Definition: Similar to sole physical but with recognition that other parent has significant time (more than standard visitation but less than joint).

Time Split:

Typically:
- Primary parent: 60-75% of time
- Other parent: 25-40% of time

Between "joint" and "sole" - middle ground

Some states use this term, others don’t.

Example:

Primary parent: Monday-Friday
Other parent: Every weekend + summer weeks

Result: 60/40 split
- Not quite "joint" (under typical threshold)
- More than standard "visitation"
- Other parent significantly involved
- But child has clear primary home

Benefits:

• More involved than sole custody
• More stable than true joint
• Balances both parents’ involvement
• Recognizes one primary home
• But maintains robust schedule with both

4. Split Physical Custody (Rare)

When there are multiple children, each parent has primary physical custody of different children.

Example:

Two children: Emma (15) and Lucas (8)

Emma lives primarily with Mom
Lucas lives primarily with Dad

Each child has different primary residence.

Why It’s Rare:

Courts strongly prefer keeping siblings together:

• Sibling relationships important
• Splitting creates additional trauma
• Children lose daily contact with siblings

Only awarded when:

• Extreme circumstances
• Older children express strong preferences
• Different needs require different parents
• Children choose to live apart
• Siblings don’t have close relationship

Problems:

• Siblings separated
• Different rules/homes complicate reunions
• Holidays/vacations complex
• May increase family division

Percentage: Less than 1% of custody cases

5. Bird´s Nest Custody (Very Rare)

Definition: Children stay in one home, and parents rotate in and out.

How It Works:

Family home: 123 Main Street

Week 1: Mom lives at 123 Main St with kids
        Dad lives elsewhere

Week 2: Dad lives at 123 Main St with kids
        Mom lives elsewhere

Children never move - parents do.

Extremely Rare Because:

• Expensive (need 3 residences: family home + each parent’s place)
• Logistically complex
• Most parents want fresh start post-divorce
• Hard to maintain boundaries
• Eventually one parent wants to sell

May work temporarily:

• Immediate post-separation
• Until final custody determined
• During school year (minimize disruption)
• Short-term solution only

Comparison Table

TypeChild's Time# of HomesTransitionsCommunication NeededChild SupportJoint Physical45-50% each2 equal homesFrequentHighReduced/NonePrimary Physical60/40 split1 primary, 1 secondaryModerateModerateModerateSole Physical70-100% one1 primaryInfrequentLow-ModerateFull amountSplitVaries by child1 per childVariesHighComplicatedBird's Nest100% one home1 (kids stay)Parents rotateVery HighVaries

Parenting Time vs Visitation{#parenting-time}

Understanding the Terminology Shift

Courts increasingly use “parenting time” instead of “visitation” – and the difference matters.

Old Term: “Visitation”

Traditional language:

• Custodial parent has “custody”
• Non-custodial parent has “visitation rights”
• Implies visiting, not parenting
• Suggests lesser role

Problems with “visitation”:

• Makes parent sound like a guest
• Diminishes parental role
• Creates psychological hierarchy
• “Visitor” not “parent”
• Can affect parent-child relationship

Modern Term: “Parenting Time”

Why courts prefer it:

• Recognizes both as parents (not visitor)
• Child-focused language
• More respectful to both parents
• Acknowledges active parenting
• Promotes healthy co-parenting

“Parenting time” = time parent actively parents child

Not “visiting” – actually caring for, supervising, and raising the child.

Practical Difference

Both terms describe the same schedules:

Old: "Father has visitation every other weekend"
New: "Father has parenting time every other weekend"

Same schedule, different framing

But language affects:

• How parents view their roles
• How children see relationships
• Court’s approach to arrangement
• Overall co-parenting dynamic

States Using “Parenting Time”

Many states now use:

• “Parenting time” (not visitation)
• “Time-sharing” (Florida)
• “Parental responsibilities” and “parenting time” (Illinois)
• “Residential schedule” (Washington)

Traditional “custody/visitation” still used in many states.

This guide uses both terms interchangeably since both remain common.

How Courts Determine Physical Custody

What Judges Consider

Physical custody determinations are based on the child’s best interests. Here’s how courts decide where your child should live.

Best Interest Standard

Every state uses “best interest of the child” as the guiding principle.

Courts ask:

“Where should this child live, and what parenting schedule serves their best interests?”

Not:

• What parents want
• What’s fair to parents
• What’s convenient for parents
• Who’s a “better” person

Only: What’s best for the child.

Primary Factors Courts Consider

1. CHILD’S AGE AND DEVELOPMENTAL NEEDS

INFANTS/TODDLERS (0-3):
- May favor primary caregiver (often mother if breastfeeding)
- Frequent, shorter visits with other parent
- Consistency and routine critical
- Attachment theory considerations
- Some courts still hesitate on 50/50 for infants

PRESCHOOL (3-5):
- Can handle more flexible schedules
- Joint physical more feasible
- Still benefit from primary home
- Transitions easier than infants

SCHOOL-AGE (6-12):
- School stability important
- Can handle week-on/week-off
- Activities and friends matter
- Input considered but not determinative

TEENAGERS (13-18):
- Preferences given significant weight
- School/activities heavily influence
- Peer relationships important
- May prefer one home base
- Court still makes final decision

2. EACH PARENT’S ABILITY TO CARE FOR CHILD

Courts evaluate:
✓ Work schedule and availability
✓ Childcare arrangements
✓ Ability to meet child's physical needs
✓ Ability to meet emotional needs
✓ Parenting skills
✓ Support system (family nearby)
✓ Home environment
✓ Financial stability (to extent it affects care)

Important: Courts don’t require parent be home 24/7. Working parents can have custody with appropriate childcare.

3. HISTORICAL CAREGIVING

"Primary caregiver" factor:

Courts ask:
- Who historically provided most care?
- Who handled doctor appointments?
- Who attended school conferences?
- Who helped with homework?
- Who made meals?
- Who did bedtime routine?
- Who stayed home when child sick?
- Who coordinated childcare?

Significant weight given to status quo and
historical patterns.

Why it matters:

• Indicates child’s attachment
• Shows proven ability to care
• Minimizes disruption to child
• Reflects actual parenting (not just claims)

Can overcome it:

• Explain why arrangement should change
• Show circumstances are different now
• Demonstrate ability to provide care going forward

4. STABILITY AND CONTINUITY

Courts favor:
✓ Maintaining child's school
✓ Keeping child in same community
✓ Preserving friendships
✓ Continuing activities/sports
✓ Minimizing disruption
✓ Stable home environment

“Stability” considerations:

• Length of time in current home/school
• Quality of school district
• Established routines
• Community ties
• Consistency in parenting

5. GEOGRAPHIC PROXIMITY

Distance between parents' homes affects:
- Feasibility of shared custody
- School attendance
- Transportation logistics
- Emergency accessibility
- Activity participation

Impact:

Same neighborhood: Joint physical very feasible
Same school district: Joint physical possible
Different districts: Usually one primary school
Different cities (30+ miles): Sole physical likely
Different states: Definitely sole physical to one

Relocation cases are separate issue – if parent with custody wants to move, must get court approval.

6. CHILD’S PREFERENCE

Age guidelines (vary by state):

Under 12: Usually not considered
12-14: Court may consider
14-16: Significant weight
16+: Strong weight (but not determinative)

Even at 17, child doesn't decide - judge does.

How preference is determined:

• Private interview with judge (in chambers)
• Guardian ad litem investigation
• Custody evaluator report
• Sometimes child testifies (rare, traumatic)

Courts look for:

• Is preference informed and thoughtful?
• Is child being pressured/manipulated?
• What’s the reason for preference?
• Is preference in child’s actual best interest?

Courts discount preference if:

• Based on less rules at one house
• Result of parental alienation
• Wanting to avoid school/responsibilities
• Child too young to understand implications

7. PARENTAL FITNESS

Fitness issues that affect physical custody:
- Substance abuse
- Domestic violence
- Mental illness (if affects parenting)
- Criminal activity
- Child abuse/neglect
- Dangerous living conditions

Note: “Unfit” parent may still get supervised visitation. Complete denial of contact is rare.

8. ABILITY TO CO-PARENT

Courts evaluate:
- Communication between parents
- Willingness to cooperate
- Respect for other parent's role
- Facilitation of relationship with other parent
- Flexibility and compromise
- History of cooperation or conflict

“Friendly parent” provision: Some states favor parent more likely to facilitate relationship with other parent.

BUT: Cannot require parent to tolerate abuse in name of “cooperation.”

9. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

History of domestic violence:
- Creates presumption AGAINST custody to abuser
  (in many states)
- May result in supervised visitation only
- Protective orders considered
- Safety of child and victim parent paramount

Impact on physical custody:

• Abuser may get supervised visits only
• No overnight visits
• Exchanges at neutral location
• Restrictions on contact

10. WORK SCHEDULES

Courts consider:
- Each parent's work hours
- Flexibility of schedule
- Who's available before/after school
- Evening and weekend availability
- Travel requirements
- Childcare plans during work

Working parent can still have custody IF:

• Appropriate childcare arranged
• Grandparents or daycare available
• Can still meet child’s needs
• Quality time when not working

11. SIBLINGS

Strong preference to keep siblings together:
- Sibling relationships important
- Splitting creates additional trauma
- Children benefit from sibling support

Only split custody if compelling reasons.

12. CHILD’S SPECIAL NEEDS

Special considerations if child has:
- Medical conditions requiring specific care
- Developmental disabilities
- Mental health needs
- Educational needs (IEP)

Courts favor parent:

• Who understands needs better
• Who historically managed condition
• With better resources/support
• In area with better services

Factors That Don´t Matter (Usually)

Courts typically do NOT consider:

• Parent’s Gender Mothers and fathers have equal rights. No presumption either way (by law).
• Parent’s Sexual Orientation Not relevant unless somehow affects parenting (which it doesn’t).
• Parent’s Marital Status Being remarried, single, dating doesn’t affect custody.
• Who Initiated Divorce Filing first is irrelevant.
• Parent’s Lifestyle Choices Religion, politics, social life (if not harmful) don’t matter.
• Who Makes More Money Income only matters to extent it affects ability to care for child. Wealthier parent doesn’t automatically get custody.
• Child’s Preference (if very young) Under 12 usually not considered at all.

Burden of Proof

Standard: Preponderance of evidence (more likely than not – 51%)

Who bears burden:

In states with joint physical presumption:
- Burden on parent opposing joint
- Must prove joint not in best interest

In states without presumption:
- Each parent proves their proposal best
- Equal burden on both

When modifying existing order:
- Higher burden - must prove material change
- AND modification in best interests

Temporary vs. Permanent Orders

Courts often issue temporary orders first:

TEMPORARY ORDER:
- Pending final trial
- Based on status quo usually
- Maintains stability during litigation
- Can last months or years
- Not final determination

PERMANENT ORDER:
- After full hearing/trial
- Based on all evidence
- Long-term arrangement
- Can still be modified later (if circumstances change)

Custody Schedules And Arrangements

Common Parenting Time Schedules

Physical custody is implemented through a parenting schedule. Here are the most common arrangements.

50/50 Joint Physical Custody Schedules

WEEK ON / WEEK OFF

Schedule:
Mon-Sun: Parent A
Mon-Sun: Parent B
(Alternates each week)

Percentage: 50/50

Pros:
✓ True equality
✓ Simple to remember
✓ Long stretches with each parent
✓ Each parent fully engaged during week
✓ Fewer transitions

Cons:
✗ Long time away from other parent
✗ Hard on young children
✗ Miss other parent by end of week
✗ School communication challenging

Best For:

• Older children (8+)
• Cooperative parents
• Parents living close
• Flexible work schedules

2-2-3 SCHEDULE

Schedule:
Mon-Tue: Parent A
Wed-Thu: Parent B
Fri-Sat-Sun: Alternates
  Weekend 1: Parent A
  Weekend 2: Parent B

Percentage: 50/50

Example week 1:
Mon-Tue: Mom
Wed-Thu: Dad  
Fri-Sat-Sun: Mom

Example week 2:
Mon-Tue: Mom
Wed-Thu: Dad
Fri-Sat-Sun: Dad

Pros:
✓ Equal time
✓ Frequent contact with both parents
✓ No more than 3 days away from either
✓ Both get weekends
✓ Good for younger kids

Cons:
✗ Many transitions (5 per week)
✗ Constant packing
✗ Can be disruptive
✗ Hard to track

Best For:

• Younger children
• Parents living very close
• When frequent contact important

2-2-5-5 SCHEDULE

Week 1:
Mon-Tue: Parent A
Wed-Thu: Parent B
Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue: Parent A

Week 2:
Mon-Tue: Parent B
Wed-Thu: Parent A
Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue: Parent B

Percentage: 50/50

Pros:
✓ Equal time
✓ Each parent gets weekdays AND weekends
✓ Regular pattern
✓ More predictable than 2-2-3

Cons:
✗ Still multiple transitions
✗ Confusing at first
✗ Both parents need flexible schedules

3-4-4-3 SCHEDULE

Week 1:
Mon-Tue-Wed: Parent A (3 days)
Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun: Parent B (4 days)

Week 2:
Mon-Tue-Wed: Parent B (3 days)
Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun: Parent A (4 days)

Percentage: 50/50 over two weeks

Pros:
✓ Both get weekdays and weekends
✓ Regular pattern
✓ Fewer transitions than 2-2-3

Cons:
✗ Complex to track
✗ Unequal week to week

ALTERNATING WEEKS WITH MIDWEEK VISIT

Week 1: Parent A (Mon-Sun)
  + Parent B gets Wednesday dinner

Week 2: Parent B (Mon-Sun)
  + Parent A gets Wednesday dinner

Percentage: 50/50 (if count full week)
             or ~43/57 (if midweek just dinner)

Pros:
✓ Mostly week-on/week-off simplicity
✓ But child sees both parents mid-week
✓ Breaks up long stretches

Cons:
✗ Extra transitions
✗ Midweek disruption to routine

60/40 to 70/30 Schedules (Primary Physical Custody)

EVERY OTHER WEEKEND + ONE WEEKNIGHT

Parent A (Primary - 70%):
- Every Monday-Friday
- Alternating weekends

Parent B (30%):
- Every other weekend (Fri evening - Sun evening)
- One weeknight (usually Wed or Thu, dinner/overnight)

Percentage: ~70/30

Pros:
✓ Stability of primary home
✓ One primary school routine
✓ But other parent stays involved
✓ Weeknight visit maintains connection

Cons:
✗ Unequal time
✗ One parent more "visitor" than co-parent
✗ Other parent less involved in daily life

Variations:

• Every other weekend only (no weeknight) = ~80/20
• Every other weekend + 2 weeknights = ~65/35
• Extended weekends (Thu evening – Mon morning) = ~65/35

WEEK ON / WEEK OFF DURING SCHOOL, SPLIT SUMMER

School Year (9 months):
Primarily with Parent A
Parent B: every other weekend

Summer (3 months):
Alternating weeks 50/50

Annual Percentage: ~60/40

Pros:
✓ School year stability
✓ Summer allows more equal time
✓ Both parents significant time
✓ Flexibility by season

Cons:
✗ Inconsistent schedule
✗ Adjustment when switching

80/20 to 100/0 Schedules (Sole Physical Custody)

STANDARD POSSESSION ORDER (Texas Example)

Non-Custodial Parent:
- 1st, 3rd, 5th weekends of month
- Thursday evenings 6-8pm weekly
- 30 days in summer
- Alternating holidays

Percentage: ~20% to non-custodial

Most common "standard visitation" nationwide.

EVERY OTHER WEEKEND ONLY

Non-Custodial Parent:
- Every other weekend (Sat-Sun or Fri-Sun)
- Maybe alternating holidays
- Maybe 1-2 weeks summer

Percentage: ~14% to non-custodial

Pros:
✓ Maximum stability for child
✓ Clear primary home
✓ Minimal transitions
✓ Simple schedule

Cons:
✗ Very limited time with other parent
✗ Risk of relationship decline
✗ Non-custodial parent feels excluded

SUPERVISED VISITATION

Non-Custodial Parent:
- 2-4 hours per week
- At supervised visitation center
- Supervisor present entire time
- No overnight visits
- No private contact

Percentage: ~1-2% to non-custodial

When Ordered:
- Substance abuse
- Domestic violence
- Child abuse concerns
- Mental health issues
- Never had relationship with child
- Reunification process

NO CONTACT

Extremely rare:
- Parental rights terminated, or
- Severe abuse/danger to child, or
- Parent incarcerated, or
- Parent completely absent

Percentage: 0% to that parent

Holiday and Vacation Schedules

Most custody orders specify:

MAJOR HOLIDAYS (Alternate yearly):
- Christmas/Winter Break (often split)
- Thanksgiving
- Spring Break
- Easter
- Memorial Day
- Labor Day
- 4th of July

MINOR HOLIDAYS:
- Mother's Day → Mother
- Father's Day → Father
- Child's birthday (split or alternate)

VACATION:
- Each parent gets 2-4 weeks
- Must give 30-60 days notice
- Cannot conflict with other parent's time
- Usually during summer

SCHOOL BREAKS:
- Winter break: Often split in half
- Spring break: Alternates yearly
- Summer: Various arrangements

Schedule Selection Factors

Consider:

Child’s Age:

• Infant: Shorter, frequent visits
• Toddler: 2-3 days max initially
• School-age: Can handle week-long
• Teen: More flexible

Distance:

• Same neighborhood: Any schedule works
• Different districts: Limits 50/50
• 30+ miles: Usually not 50/50
• Different states: Weekend visitation only

Parents’ Work Schedules:

• 9-5 jobs: Week on/week off works
• Shift work: Needs custom schedule
• Travel: Longer stretches when home
• Weekends off: More weekend time

Parenting Styles:

• Similar: 50/50 easier
• Different: May cause conflict
• One strict, one lenient: Child may struggle

Physical Custody by State

State Variations

Physical custody laws vary by state. Here are key differences:

States with Joint Physical Presumption

CALIFORNIA:

• Frequent and continuing contact with both parents
• No specific percentage defined
• “Substantial periods” with each
• Family Code § 3020

ARIZONA:

• Requires maximum possible parenting time to both
• A.R.S. § 25-403
• Presumes joint beneficial

IDAHO:

• Joint presumed in best interests
• Idaho Code § 32-717B

NEW MEXICO:

• Statutory preference for maximum time with both
• NMSA § 40-4-9.1

Specific Percentage States

WISCONSIN:

• Presumes 25% minimum to each parent
• WI Stat § 767.41

ALABAMA:

• No presumption but 35% = substantial time

States Using “Parenting Time” Language

• Illinois: “Parenting time” and “parenting responsibilities”
• Washington: “Residential schedule”
• Florida: “Time-sharing”
• Many others moving toward this language

Standard Possession Orders

TEXAS:

• Detailed “Standard Possession Order” in statute
• 1st, 3rd, 5th weekends
• Thursday evenings
• Specific holiday schedule
• Texas Family Code § 153.312

Advantages And Disadvantages

Evaluating Different Arrangements

Joint Physical Custody (50/50)

Advantages:

For Children:

• Equal time with both parents
• Strong relationship with both
• Sees both as equal caregivers
• Minimizes feeling of loss
• Benefits from both parenting styles

For Parents:

• Shared daily responsibility
• Both fully engaged
• Neither excluded
• Regular breaks
• Equal footing

Financially:

• May reduce/eliminate child support
• Expenses shared more equally
• Both bear costs during their time

Disadvantages:

For Children:

• Frequent transitions
• Two sets of rules
• Never fully “settled”
• Pack/unpack constantly
• Two bedrooms/wardrobes needed

For Parents:

• Requires excellent communication
• Must live near each other
• Less flexibility to relocate
• Coordination constantly needed
• High conflict difficult

Primary Physical Custody (70/30)

Advantages:

For Children:

• Stability of primary home
• Consistent routine
• One main friend group/activities
• Less disruption
• But still significant time with both

For Primary Parent:

• More control over daily routine
• Can establish own household rules
• Less back-and-forth
• More continuity

For Other Parent:

• Quality focused time
• Special activities during visits
• Regular schedule
• Maintains relationship

Disadvantages:

For Children:

• Less time with one parent
• May feel they “lost” a parent
• Unequal relationships possible

For Primary Parent:

• Most daily responsibility
• Less personal time
• Childcare burden

For Other Parent:

• Limited daily involvement
• Miss daily moments
• Feel like visitor
• Pays child support

Sole Physical Custody (80/20 or less)

Advantages:

For Children:

• Maximum stability
• One clear home
• Minimal transitions
• Consistent routine
• One primary community

For Custodial Parent:

• Full control of daily life
• Minimal coordination needed
• Can parent without interference
• Clear authority

Disadvantages:

For Children:

• Very limited time with other parent
• Risk of weakened relationship
• May resent arrangement

For Custodial Parent:

• All responsibility
• No breaks
• Can be overwhelming
• Potential burnout

For Other Parent:

• Minimal time
• Feels excluded
• Difficulty maintaining bond
• “Visitor” status

Modifyng Physical Custody

Changing Where Your Child Lives

Physical custody can be modified, but courts set a high bar.

When Can You Modify?

Requirements:

1. Material Change in Circumstances

Significant change since last order:

Examples:
- Parent relocates
- Parent remarries (domestic violence concern)
- Child's needs change (special needs develop)
- Parent's work schedule changes significantly
- Child's school situation changes
- Parent develops substance abuse
- Domestic violence occurs
- Child's preference changes (if older)

2. Change Benefits Child

Not enough to show circumstances changed:
Must prove modification serves child's best interests

3. Waiting Period (Some States)

Many states require:
- 1-2 years after original order
- Before modification allowed
- Prevents constant relitigation

Exceptions:
- Emergency situations
- Child endangered
- Material change affecting safety

Common Reasons for Modification

From Sole/Primary to Joint:

• Child is older now (can handle 50/50)
• Parents’ relationship improved
• Geographic distance reduced
• Parent’s work schedule changed
• Child requests more time with other parent

From Joint to Sole/Primary:

• Parents unable to cooperate
• Child struggling with transitions
• Geographic distance increased
• Child’s school/activities require stability
• One parent’s circumstances changed

Increasing Non-Custodial Time:

• Parent rehabilitated (substance abuse)
• Stronger relationship developed
• Child older and wants more time
• Parent’s availability improved

Decreasing Time:

• Safety concerns developed
• Substance abuse relapse
• Domestic violence
• Parent’s availability decreased

Relocation Cases

Special category of modification:

If custodial parent wants to move:
- Must notify other parent (30-60 days typically)
- May need court permission
- Must prove move in child's best interests
- Consider impact on other parent's time
- May result in custody modification

Courts balance:
- Custodial parent's right to move
- Child's relationship with other parent
- Reason for move
- Impact on child

Burden of Proof

Higher than original custody determination:

Must prove:
1. Material change in circumstances
2. Change wasn't contemplated in original order
3. Modification in child's best interests
4. New arrangement better than current

Standard: Preponderance of evidence (51%)
But courts heavily favor stability

Process

Step 1: File Motion

• In same court as original order
• State specific reasons for change
• Provide supporting evidence
• Pay filing fees ($200-500)

Step 2: Serve Other Parent

• Legal notice required
• Give opportunity to respond
• Follow state service rules

Step 3: Mediation

• Usually required first
• Attempt to reach agreement
• Cheaper than trial

Step 4: Hearing

• Present evidence
• Call witnesses
• Other parent opposes
• Judge decides

Step 5: New Order

• If granted, modified order issued
• Effective immediately
• Enforceable like any order

Timeline and Cost

Timeline:

• 3-6 months typical
• 6-12 months if contested
• 1-2 years if trial needed

Costs:

• $5,000-$15,000 attorney fees
• $3,000-$10,000 custody evaluation (if ordered)
• Filing fees
• Expert witnesses
• Mediation costs

Frequently Asked Questions

Physical CustodyLegal CustodyWhere child livesWho makes decisionsDaily careMajor choicesResidence and routineEducation, healthcare, religionDetermines child supportDoesn't affect support